We've all done it a million times. Said the words "thank you" when we certainly don't mean it. A mother-in-law gives you potholders for Christmas and you say through gritted teeth "Thank You" while inside you wonder why her real daughter got amazing things while you got friggin potholders. Or when you were young and Great Aunt Mabel bought you a ridiculously hidious frilly birthday outfit that mom made you wear at some family outing Mabel would also attend and you would have to go up and say "thank you for the pretty dress" meanwhile wishing you were wearing anything else and dying of embarassment over the ugliness of it. Or, my favorite is the time at my bridal shower when a slightly crazy older lady gave me a piece of lingerie that was as big as a house. It literally was a plus size 3x - I weighed 122 at the time - yep...what do you say to that one? My reply was "oh thanks! My husband to be will just love this!" while trying not to make eye contact with any of my friends so that I wouldn't bust out laughing.
We all have these stories and have said and done it more times than can be counted. Said "thank you" and not meant it at all. Not even the slightest bit.
It's easy to say "thank you" when you don't have to mean it. It's life, it's human, it just rolls off the tongue...and best of all, no one will ever know your thoughts. They won't know you're full ot if, but will just take the words at face value. So, my question today, is how do you say "thank you" for something awful and truly mean it? What if the person you need to say thank you to is God - who knows your heart and your true thoughts and cannot be faked out? What if you've just come to the realization that you are supposed to thank God for a situation that seems unthankable? As part of a reading for a group I'm in, I was hit in the face with this yesterday. I'm supposed to give thanks to God for everything - EVERYTHING. Um....yeah...how do you do this and mean it?
So today I started my road to being truly thankful for the bad things that have happened to me over the past 18 months. I spent some time with God and told him "thank You". Thank you for my 1st miscarriage. Thank You for my 2nd miscarriage. And last but not least, thank You for my 3rd. Do I mean it yet? Nope. Not at all. But I know I'm doing the right thing by saying it, and surrendering to knowing that I'm supposed to give thanks in every situation, because God is there during both the good and the bad. I will keep saying "Thank You" in crying prayers to God and I truly believe that eventually I will mean it. I don't know how long it will take, but it will happen. And...it will help heal. Cause any time I am faithful to do what I know God wants of me, He is faithful right back to me.
So...if you have any advice on how to be thankful for something that seems unworthy of it, please do tell. And....what are those horrendous gifts you've been given that you've faked your way through the thanksgiving?
